Geoisms
  • The best child is the child that's on fire.
  • I like Fox News, it's like a cross between CNN and Sesame Street.
  • Ever carried a sign that says 'Will work for food'?  Me neither, so how the hell did I end up doing it?
  • Statistics show that the #1 reason for suicide in this country is people killing themselves.  Why do they do this?  How the hell should I know, I'm not one of those people.
Blazing Bunny Spreads Cricket Club Fire
Dildos Still Illegal in Alabama Guns Still OK!
LONDON (Reuters) - A rabbit set alight by a bonfire at a British cricket club got its revenge when it ran burning into a hut and set it ablaze destroying costly equipment, the club said on Friday. Members of Devizes cricket club in Wiltshire, western England, were burning dead branches when a rabbit caught up in the waste sped burning from the flames spreading a fire which destroyed lawnmowers and tools worth 60,000 pounds ($110,000). "After it had been going 5 minutes, the rabbit shot out of the bonfire on fire and went into the hut which is our equipment store," club chairman John Bedbrook told Reuters. Two fire engines were called to extinguish the blaze. The rabbit's skeleton was discovered in the charred hut.
"The firemen were certainly concerned about the rabbit. They felt sorry for it," said Bedbrook.
A decision issued yesterday by the 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals says Alabama doesn't have to lift its silly, arcane 1998 law banning the sale of sex toys. The Constitution does not include a right to sexual privacy, the panel of three judges ruled. Many Americans would disagree, including this one. To paraphrase Andrew Orlowski's brilliant quip about the INDUCE Act, under this law one could stroll down Alabama's southern streets selling semiautomatic rifles and dildos, and be arrested for the dildos.
"In this case, the American Civil Liberties Union ('ACLU') invites us to add a new right to the current catalogue of fundamental rights under the Constitution: a right to sexual privacy. It further asks us to declare Alabama's statute prohibiting the sale of 'sex toys' to be an impermissible burden on this right. Alabama responds that the statute exercises a time-honored use of state police power -- restricting the sale of sex. We are compelled to agree with Alabama and must decline the ACLU's invitation. (...)

"Alabama's Anti-Obscenity Enforcement Act prohibits, among other things, the commercial distribution of 'any device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs for any thing of pecuniary value.'"

Me....that's right, I'm the Jackass of the Month!! For winning Baker's SuperBowl Pool!! So everyone else an just hate me now!!!!

 

hahahahahahahahahahaah

 
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Jackass of the Week

Hunter S. Thompson Dead @ 67

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